I've never been a big fan of the porno genre, myself. But I think I'm a little less of a fan after watching what I just watched. Although, calling this mess a porno would be a bit of a stretch. What this really is is the pinnacle of unintentional WTF filmmaking. The ultimate abomination from the bottom of the barrel. A film so terrible, only the most hardened of bad movies lovers could withstand it. an unintentional practical joke on anyone looking for some decent fapping material. And some might even call it boring. This is the one and only, Bat Pussy!

Bat Pussy begins seemingly in the middle of the movie, during an argument between an ugly, and most likely drunk middle aged married couple. It's not entirely clear what they were babbling about near the beginning due to sound issues and mumbling. But out of the blue, they take it to the bed and the ugly wife starts sucking the ugly husband's ugly, limp dick, which will remain limp for the entire duration of the film. Is he impotent? Was he that turned off my his 50 year old co-star? Has he had too much to drink? Nobody knows. That's what I love about these types of movies. Nobody knows. But this is sort of a porno, so, he plays along and pretends to be hard, repeatedly uttering the phrase "Oh, God! That's what the picture in the magazine was!". I'm not entirely sure what he meant by that, but I'm pretty sure a crew member just burped.

Then after raising up and asking the director "what?" he quickly starts berating the wife for her lack of dick sucking skills. Only to push her away and bury his face in her crotch to "suck her pussy" (his words). Her response to this is "You motherfuckn bastard! You don't know how to do nothin". Which is totally believable since the man is starring in a porno (for the lack of a better word), and is still nowhere near erect.

These two go back and forth between bickering, kidding around and making sad attempts at getting each other off with their mouths, whilst spouting improvised horseshit like "Every time I ram my tongue up your pussy, it comes out your ass hole! Now, what the fucken deal is that?". Meanwhile, a new character is added into the mix. Bat Pussy's super senses informs her about the shitty, old married couple trying to get it on, and she disapproves. "Nobody fucks around on Bat Pussy", she says, and she soon crashes their party, and almost immediately ends up in a head giving threesome, which I guess is supposed to be the big payoff. So, we do get a dash of hotness near the end. Yet, that idiot's still as limp as ever. So, nobody ever actually gets fucked.

Despite not loving the genre, I've come cross alot of weird, terrible, disgusting pornos. This one is simply on another planet. In a class by itself. An unsexy as all hell trash anomaly that seemingly exists just to make you wonder why it does in fact exist. As well as why the people involved didn't just up and bail halfway through, and instead kept on going until this project was seen through. I must admit, I know very little about Bat Pussy, so, There's not really anything more I can say to make you understand what I've just seen.

Most of the badness and pointless WTFness comes from the insanely stupid dialogue blurted out by ugly, drunk trash with unfortunate genitalia, and what may or may not be attempts at humor. And it seems like they're trying to throw in a story here and there, but they never really commit. And I can't really blame them. After all, this IS a retarded porno with one limp dick, a ornery married couple, a jealous Bat Woman ripoff, no script, no plan. And no redeeming qualities. Highly recommended! 2/10

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zYndGsZj3-Y

And if you think I'm making all of this up, here's a few minutes of dialogue.

I'd bet this thread gets deleted by the end of the day.

Never seen the movie, and your review doesn't exactly make me want to seek it out.

>>2

I'd bet this thread gets deleted by the end of the day.

If I'm lucky.#

Never seen the movie, and your review doesn't exactly make me want to seek it out

My job here is done. Have fun not watching Bat Pussy.

I so want to see this movie after reading your review. It sounds awesome.

which will remain limp for the entire duration of the film.

Not really something that never happens in a porno

As a teenager I was always surprised that guys getting sucked off could remain so limp. It was a source of endless discussion among us virgins. We were all so young and horny then.

I miss the good ol' days.

I miss the good ol' days.

Me too.

s a teenager I was always surprised that guys getting sucked off could remain so limp.

Well, some chicks don't know what they're doing. Some don't even know how to not use teeth. At that point, getting hard is the least of your problems.

>>6

Well, some chicks don't know what they're doing. SOme don't even know how to not use teeth. At that point, getting hard is the least of your problems.

As a horny teenager I wouldn't have cared. She wouldn't even have had to touch me. Get a naked female within 10 feet of me and I'd be so hard I could hammer nails with it.

Sounds like you might have settled for a guy.

I absolutely will never be watching this one, but your review was great!

>>9
Thanks, anon. It has its moments.

hardred

Is that a porno term?

I was so blown I couldn't read the rest.

>>11
Where the fuck did I say hardred?

Maybe I'm a weird motherfcker, but this sounds like a must-watch!

>>13
It's natural. Go with it.

If nothing else, it's nice to be able to join a conversation about this mess of a movie.

Sold.

"Oh... I'm not afraid."

You will be, friend.

too much to drink?

Dude man everyone knows smoking pot leads to limp dick syndrome not drink.

>>18
.....you clearly haven't been with very many drunk dudes.

>>19
I'll bet he's blown a couple of them...

But yeah. Alcohol makes me wanna not fuck.

I did not rise to where I am in the acting movie industry by going around sucking dudes cocks.

Check out the wiki long term usage of marajuana makes your dick soft as well as decreases your IQ.

actually I looked that up and wiki doesn't mention the dick softness, but it has been studied I could find data if you desire

>>22
Yeah. Go find the data.

>>24
Bullshit.

I watched this probably 4 or 5 years ago and tried to do a Drunken Review of it...and I just couldn't. I either wasn't drunk enough (unlikely), was too drunk (plausible, but I don't think so), or the movie was SO bad that not even I could review it. And I've reviewed some awful, smutty stuff.

It's funny that you mentioned the male leads inability to rise to the occasion, because that's really the only thing I remember about this entire flick.

I'm SO not surprised you've seen this.

There's not a helluva lot going on here, so, one must have to resort to talking about how bad it is, which provides quite a bit of material. Thanks for reading.

Tried looking for the whole movie...silly Google, I wanted Bat Pussy, not Baseball Bat Pussy. Is this movie better or worse than The Geek?

I don't know for sure, but there's a very good chance it's worse.

Lol "My pussy ain't a warsh tub".

Why?

Very entertaining review. Far more entertaining the this piece of shit movie is that's for sure. What a confusing drunken mess. I'm almost ashamed to admit I've seen it.
Nice to see you writing reviews again anon, keep it up!!

>>31
I think it's funny that the only other people on here who have seen this are chicks.

Thanks for the encouragement. I will try to keep it up...

The title's so great I'd hate to spoil it by watching the movie.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RUDPd5xm2kk

^ Not a real movie. The youtube clip provided is a hoax.

>>34
^ Too lazy to read the review... or to even listen to the youtube clip.

>>35
^ Objection denied: asked and answered.

>>36
^ Hasn't seen Things, so, opinions will not be taken seriously by anyone.

>>37
^ Overruled. Buggering the witness.

>>38
Bugger.

>>39
^ Still in love with anon.

>>40
^ Runs a top secret website where you have to kill bugs with your mouse

>>41
^ is a member of said website.

It does more than just that though. It also farts, burps, and swears!

Either way, the WTF elements aside, seeing ucking fuglies just isn't my bag.

Haha it says right there in the op 1973. I'm so dumb! I don't know why I thought it was the 50s. They didn't even have color in the 50s did they? Maybe it was the stupid hillbilly accents.

It was easy to find. Just a few clicks. I am a child of the computer age